You Are Not Your Fears – Parenting A Child With Down Syndrome.
August 16, 2021
We are welcoming one of our favorite moms back to the GiGi’s Blog today with a great reminder our fears are not what we should be basing our “grade” as a parent on.
Here’s a story. It’s kinda long but I promise it’s worth it.
- When I was pregnant I was convinced Judah would have Down syndrome (spoiler alert-he does.)
- I was constantly googling Down syndrome, I was asking everyone I knew (including doctors) what they thought. I stayed up nights worrying if he had it. I contemplated adoption or termination of pregnancy. I never got the simple test that could have given me a definitive answer.
- When Judah was born and we knew (before the doctors knew) I thought about running away. I dreamt of taking Bobby and Calvin and getting the hell out of there. I thought I might die.
- Sounds pretty awful huh? You might even be thinking what a shitty mom I was.
- I remember one distinct moment though. I was laboring and all these bells and alarms went off and doctors poured in as my sweet nurse friend tried to keep me calm. I screamed.
PLEASE TELL ME HES OKAY” as his heart rate dipped and things got serious. I felt the most primal, unconditional love for the human that I didn’t even know yet. Here’s why I’m telling you this. It doesn’t matter what you think. You aren’t your fears or judgments or any of the irrational thoughts that come into your brain. You are what you DO. You are your actions.
To all the moms dreaming of their single life or a week at a hotel. You are still making delicious dinners and kissing them goodnight. You aren’t a bad mom, you are a mom.
If you aren’t a parent, this one is for you too. Look at how you live. Are you kind? Loyal? Helpful? If you answered yes, then don’t worry about wishing you had your friend’s money or your own youth. Those are just thoughts. That’s ego. The real you is primal and unconditional love. Don’t ever forget that. I love you. Xoxo
If you or someone you know is looking to connect and learn about the resources GiGi’s Playhouse has to offer please reach out today. syracuse@gigisplayhouse.org. Families looking for some incredibly special respite care please visit our friends at Davids Refuge.
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