5 Powerful Ways a Sister Cares

Sisters Barb and Patty, and the Strength Found in Community and Courage

When we say that siblings are included at GiGi’s Playhouse Orange County, we mean siblings of all ages, in every role life may bring them into. Barb Boteler is the sister and devoted caregiver of her sister Patty, who is 63 and has Down syndrome. For their entire lives, they have shared a bond rooted in love, humor, and deep familiarity. Patty has always been a sparkle at the Playhouse, the first to dance, quick with a joke, full of joy, and always ready for fun. She is funny, well traveled, and has a natural love for music and movement that lights up every room she enters.

Over time, Patty’s health has become more fragile, and Barb has carried the responsibility of caregiving with extraordinary devotion. It has been deeply difficult to watch some of Patty’s abilities change and fade, especially those joyful parts of her personality that have always been so central to who she is. And yet, even in this season, her spirit is still there. The humor still shows up. The laughter still comes through. The love of music and dancing still finds its way out in small, meaningful moments that mean everything.

Because of Patty’s declining health, she will soon be transitioning into assisted living. It is a significant and deeply personal change for both sisters, one that reflects how much care she now needs and how much love surrounds her as she moves into this next chapter. Through it all, Barb remains not only her sister, but her steady presence, her advocate, and her source of comfort and continuity.

They have always been inseparable at GiGi’s, rarely missing a week of Fantastic Friends. Barb would carry Patty uphill through snow both ways if that is what it took to get her here. Recently, attendance has become more limited due to Patty’s health, but Barb still makes time to stay connected to the place that has supported them both.

On a recent visit, Barb stopped in to drop off a donation, since she is unable to attend the Gala this year. In that moment, she shared updates on Patty, but also on herself. Because caregiving someone you have known and loved your entire life is not only physically demanding, it is emotionally complex. Barb carries it with grace, honesty, and strength that is quietly remarkable.

She often shares that her peace comes from Wednesdays at GiGi’s. While Patty participates in GiGiFIT and Fantastic Friends, Barb sits with other parents and caregivers at the Playhouse, talking, laughing, and supporting one another. That group has become more than conversation. It is community in its truest form. One of the hardest parts of Patty’s illness, Barb has shared, is missing those Wednesday evenings, which have become a grounding support system for her.

As concerns about dementia grew, Barb attended the UCI MIND presentation led by Dr. Mark Mapstone. It was an emotional and uncertain moment for her, filled with both fear and hope. In the weeks that followed, she found the courage to reach out and was able to meet with Dr. Mapstone alongside Patty. They left that meeting with a renewed sense of direction and hope, grounded in both science and compassion.

GiGi’s offers more than programs. It offers expertise, friendship, and community that holds families through their most difficult seasons. Barb is brave, deeply loving, and unwavering in her devotion to her sister. And Patty, in her own way, continues to give just as much back. Her humor still breaks through, her joy still surfaces, and her spirit, even as things change, is still very much present. Together, they remind us that love does not fade with circumstance. It adapts, it deepens, and it endures.