Tim’s Birth Story

Tim’s Birth Story
By Mom, Nancy

Tim was born in Texas City, TX on March 8, 1984. He was 6 lb., 13 oz. and 20 inches long. Other than looking like he was REALLY mad, there was nothing I could see that would tell me about our impending journey…

Let me back up a few months first. Tim was conceived when his older brother, Chris, was 5 months old. I thought I had the flu, because I was only sick for about 10 days, and it sorta went away. But it came back about 2 weeks later, for about a week. By the end of that summer, I was sick every day, almost all day. I was only able to eat Tootsie Rolls and Hershey bars, and drink Pepsi–I couldn’t hold anything else down. I lost all the weight I had worked so hard to gain after Chris was born, and the doctor started to get worried about my physical health. Then I started fainting. When I went to the doctor, he asked me how far along I was, and I thought the doctor was confused. He bet me the cost of the doctor’s visit that I was pregnant, and proved it with a blood test. It turned out that I was halfway through the pregnancy, and REALLY physically sick. The doctor continued to monitor me while we tried different foods and eating at different times, none of which helped. The doctor arranged for me to have an IV of fluids needed to bring my weight up, but lo and behold!—Thanksgiving saved me, and I’d been able to eat enough to gain 5 lbs.! It was the break I needed, and I began to be able to eat regular, healthy meals with no more sickness. The doctor did 4 ultrasounds to show me how well the baby was growing, that he didn’t show any signs of conditions like Spina Bifida or Down Syndrome, and tried to convince me I was sick because the baby was a girl.

When I went into labor we waited until around 5 to go to the hospital. When we got there the nurses kept telling me I wasn’t ready to deliver, and they were going to send me home. Since they were sending me home, they didn’t give me an IV with Demerol to help the contractions. At a few minutes to 6 pm they confirmed they were sending me home, and I told the nurse I didn’t think that was a good idea, since I had to push. The nurse took one look and went running down the hall yelling, “If we don’t get her into Delivery RIGHT NOW, she will deliver where she is!!” 🙂 The doctor still hadn’t arrived, because they told him not to hurry. Once he got there he discovered that Tim was ‘face up’, which risks broken facial bones, so the doctor had to PUSH HIM BACK UP to turn him around (don’t forget, there were no pain meds…)! Tim rushed out quick once he rolled over, and I had to laugh at the angry look on his face. I don’t remember much else of the Delivery room, but they wrapped him and gave him to me as we went back to recovery, and I held him until I started to fall asleep around 9 pm; the nurses finally convinced me to give him up and get some sleep. I didn’t know until later that there was already a suspicion that something was up, but they knew how I had struggled with him and so they left me some time to bond with my precious boy. I learned later that his temperature was still way too low, even after 3 hours wrapped in a blanket, held in my arms. Nurses performed an Apgar test after birth, and I was told later that Tim only scored at all because his eyes were open and he was breathing…otherwise there WAS no score, and when they took him after I fell asleep, he only scored a 2 or 3.

By the morning Tim had been seen by his Primary Care physician, a Pediatric specialist, and the Lab. He’d been poked and prodded, and the only thing that was definite at that point was that he was a little jaundiced—and that he had all the markers for Down Syndrome. They were doing blood testing for that, because after all, DS happened ‘only to mothers over 35’–and I was 1 month shy of my 21st birthday, so that COULDN’T have been the problem. Tim’s doctor told me he was ‘99.995% certain’ Tim had Down Syndrome, and not to read ANYTHING older than a few years, because older information would scare me. I was SO afraid I did something wrong and they were going to take him away from me, so I was also very confused when the hospital just told me to take him home and treat him the same way I would his older brother, at least until they could set me up with a Down Syndrome specialist and a school for evaluation.

In the end, I met a mother and daughter at a local McDonald’s while out with a friend and our kids. I watched, fascinated, as the 14-year old girl with DS went to the counter, decided on her order, and counted out the money needed. She even told her Mother what change she should get back! I approached her and asked what school the girl went to, and in the conversation, Mother told me to contact Project Launch out of the UTMB (University of Texas Medical Branch) in Galveston. That contact led to Tim’s first evaluation at 2 months old, and entry into the Early Intervention program after that. I learned about DS from that school and Tim’s wonderful Teacher, Nella Bea. I met other families who shared their stories, and I found out that while younger than most of the parents, my story was pretty much the same. Coming back to Illinois was really hard, because I didn’t know what services were available to Tim here. He has always been lucky with schools, but there has been little to no support over the years for parents; so I can’t begin to tell you how happy I was to find GiGi’s Playhouse through my daughter’s friendship with the stepdaughter of our first Playhouse Coordinator, Diane Husar. I sincerely hope no parent ever has to ‘go it alone’ like I did, ever again, and I make sure both in my personal and professional lives that when I encounter parents whose child has Down syndrome they know where their nearest GiGi’s Playhouse is!