\u201cGo home,\u201d he said. \u201cKeep us updated.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
My hands were shaking on the steering wheel as I kept driving. I called my husband. I called my father. I kept driving, all the way back to Knightdale in rush hour traffic.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
The next few hours were a blur. I paced with Ellie \u2013 my (now 19-year-old) Sheltie mix – in the yard.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Somehow we were turning into a building next to Wake Med.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
There were conversations. Tests.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
A big one with a needle because it was too early for the other \u201cbig test with a needle.\u201d It was called a CVS test, and in a week, they could basically count the baby\u2019s chromosomes.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
How many babies are carried to term with this condition? We asked. Oh here over half, we were told.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
We were give two websites. The dark website, where women talked about the tough choice they had made and how deeply it impacted them \u2013 but most were confident with their decision. And the happy website, with photos of families and kids with wide eyes.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Down Syndrome.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
We knew nothing.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
The doctors and nurses were amazing. The people on the phone who called me about scheduling \u201cdecisions\u201d who were telling me that, in the state of North Carolina, I was \u201crunning out of time,\u201d were not so amazing.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
It passed by in a blur and none of it was happy. At the anatomy scan, which we had to schedule early (because male politicians had decided they needed to be part of the process, I guess), most women are looking to catch a glimpse of what their baby would look like. We were looking for nasal bones and something called a nuchal fold. We were looking to make sure it had a face (we had been given an initial diagnosis of T13, which, thankfully, was not accurate, but exacerbated our paranoia), had a heart.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
It wasn\u2019t fun or heartwarming or touching.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
We didn\u2019t know it was Henry.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
When we actually met Henry, he hadn\u2019t had a great day, honestly. And neither had I. His heart rate had dropped, and my blood pressure had tanked. I was in and out of consciousness, and he was purply and goblin like (though the cutest goblin in an ever). But he liked us. It turned out he liked us a lot.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
We watched Golden Girls and listened to \u201cShakedown Street,\u201d and we were a family that first night at WakeMed.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Children with Down Syndrome aren\u2019t always happy. They don\u2019t just go to \u201cspecial people.\u201d They are little punks just like the rest of us (albeit cute punks). They\u2019re really just children.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
A friend I met at a Buddy Walk right after the diagnosis (pro-tip \u2013 don\u2019t go to a Buddy Walk right after your diagnosis, you might be a basket case) told me her kid was just a kid, but I didn\u2019t get it.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I get it now.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Today is World Down Syndrome Day and while we\u2019re celebrating our kids, we\u2019re also celebrating our families and what we\u2019ve learned along the way.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
We\u2019re also eating cupcakes. With blue dye. On school picture day. Oops.<\/p>\n\n\n
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