When the big dreams become reality.

We are pretty lucky in this community to have some wonderful people who know how to put there hearts out in writing. Today we get to hear from someone who is so easy to love. One of the Syracuse Playhouse’s first cheerleaders when it was still just a “hey do you think we should” thought.  Randi is a strong, fierce and fun, she sets a wonderful example for all us younger moms!

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Grab a cup of something warm and let your heart smile while reading what Randi has been up to this month.
To the mother of the little girl with Down Syndrome whom I saw at Kohl’s today:
She won’t always be with you; she WILL go to school some day; she WILL get a job and have friends; she WILL carve out a life that fits her just right.

Jared
Let me tell you why I know:
Two weeks ago, we dropped off our oldest son, Jared to college at Otsego Academy. There, he will live in a house with some other young men and women. There, he will cook dinner and share in the household chores. There, he will go to the community health club for a workout, a local restaurant for some dinner, and nearby Colgate University for a class or two. He will be doing all this without me, without the “managing” that has enveloped his life for the past 22 years. I won’t be telling him to grab a coat because the forecast calls for rain. I won’t be making sure he has gluten free choices when we go out to dinner. I have not even heard from him for a few days, since his last text. He did, however, at the beginning, request that his bathrobe be sent so that he might avoid another embarrassing half-clothed middle of the night fire drill. Oh, how he laughed when he told me that story. And now, I don’t know what he is up to; it’s been a few days. Like his brother Jake, a freshman at SUNY Geneseo, he is on to a new part of his life, a part that doesn’t include mom or dad. He’s in college.
The day we dropped him off, he looked a bit nervous. My heart was breaking for him, but I know this is what he needs. He needs to go away and be just Jared, not, my son with Down syndrome. He needs to make his own identity, his own friends, his own plans. He called that first night, sending me into another wash of tears that I couldn’t let him hear. He said he was kind of homesick, and it took everything in my power to not jump into the car and drive the hour and ½ to get him, to bring him home. But, I told him what we all tell our children: “It will be ok; you are just tired; everything looks better in the morning”, words that I half-believed but had to sell. I hung up the phone and went to bed, waking an hour later in a panic because I hadn’t told him where his extra toothbrushes were. And there, in the middle of the night, I made my way to his room, dark and still smelling of him. I lay down on his bed, clutching the little lamb who watched over him during his heart surgery such a long time ago, and I cried. I cried as hard as I cried 22 years ago, when they told me my son had Down syndrome, when they told me they weren’t sure when he would walk, if he would talk… When I thought he might be with me forever. As I rocked and cried on his bed, keening softly so as not to wake my younger son and husband while they slept in other rooms, I was struck with the fact that I was crying because Jared was gone, because he grew up and left , just like he was supposed to do.

Randi Downs

Down syndrome, central new york

 

Thank you so much Randi, you have us all wiping away tears. Tears of pride. If you love Randi’s writing you can read more from her on her blog Growing Up With Jared.   We hope to be hearing from Jared as he gets settled into his new routine, we can’t wait to hear about all he is learning and accomplishing!

 

Do you have something you would like to share with our community? We would love to hear from you! Please send a message to Heather at hrodriguez@gigisplayhouse.org for more details.

 

educate.inspire.believe

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3 Comments

  1. Richard Reilly on September 25, 2015 at 8:42 am

    Powerful! Congratulations Jared! Randi, as parents (and grandparents) your words and example help us to trust, to practice letting go. A new adventure begins. Richard Reilly – The Grandparent Connection.

  2. Nancy Dean on September 25, 2015 at 9:33 pm

    Hi Randi, I was hoping to have an opportunity to talk to you again. I had no idea your family was part of the Gigi’s family. I was the staff person who was talking to Jared his first night while he was waiting for you to call because he was a little homesick. Jared is a fantastic young man who I actually felt priveleged to have a conversation with because he let me in on some of the things my five year daughter may face in her life and assured me that as long as he was around she would always have a friend and he hasn’t even met her. He also said she would be okay because I knew enough to be worried about what she would face and she would know she didn’t have to face things alone. I wish every parent of a young child with Down syndrome could have a conversation with Jared. But I also wanted you to know that while you were having your good cry, he was bragging about you like you were a rock star. He said you were the greatest mom and cook and that you were famous, the best Mom ever. He also said he gave/gives you a hard time alot which he shouldn’t do but with his awesome heart melting grin he told me “it was his job to give you a hard time”. Jared is an amazing young man. Everyone loves him here. I’ve just started my school journey – kindergarten – but what your family and more importantly what Jared has accomplished gives me so much hope for my daughter and what her future holds. Nancy Dean, Arden’s Mom

  3. Randi Downs on September 26, 2015 at 10:41 am

    To Poppy,
    Louis is so lucky to have you for a grandpa!! Thank you for your kind words! I will pass them on to Jared! Perhaps Louis and Jared could meet someday?
    And to Nancy,
    Words cannot express how happy and relieved I was to have you with Jared that first night! Something in your voice told me you would make sure he was ok. Thank you for sharing Jared’s word with me!! I’m hoping he can use his gift to talk to new parents as you say! Wouldn’t that be the coolest? Please give Arden a hug for me!!
    Love,
    Randi

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